There's always a reason to be happy. Even I am in my darkest, saddest moments in life... I need to choose to be happy.

What's the reason of my happiness? I found a good reason... and that is to be me! I must be thankful that I am "me". I need to appreciate that I am "me". The "me" inside "me". What's with "me" that I can't move on without using the word "me"?

Me, is a word that simply describes "me". I am happy, satisfied, looking for better in life (ironic? yeah) and more.

I am happy because I found a reason that enriches my self-perception. I thought I was down. I am nothing. I am lost. I am broken. I am ... gone. But, this situation lift my spirit, encourages me to be better. I am more than myself. I made myself. I sacrifice many things in life to be in this situation and this is not the right time to end it all. 

I need to promote myself and be promoted!

I deserve it for all the reason I know.

I need to think positively for this is the only thing I could hold on!

I am not choosy for my potential husband but I believe quality and character is important for a life partner. It is not a matter of age but a matter of handling responsibility. I am 24 years old right now. I am heartbroken while writing this blog my tears are pouring. A while ago, I just met the man I thought  my one but tonight I officially closed our relationship ---  and forever not to talk to each other since few days from now he is leaving the country for his study grant abroad.

At the age of 25 years old, I want to get married. I want to have my own family... a husband, a son, a house and possibly a daughter. I only wanted was to be happy at that age --- obtain possible good memories with the man I love and be the father of my children.

Yet, I'm leaving him because I can't take him anymore.

That moment, I gave him a piece of paper that indicates 10 reasons why I'm leaving him.

It was difficult for me to hand over the paper and seeing him but I need to do it... for clarity. He is a man and I believe they are logical people  that needs reason. So , looking at his eyes and me almost crying, handed over the paper and said "These are the reasons." I can't hold my tears and I wiped it out.   

I said, "Sorry, I need to block you on facebook. I need to forget."
He replied, "No."
I don't know what to think...
I don't want to prolong my sadness. I wanted to forget him and move on.

FORGET: The happy memories we shared together, the sad stories I told him, the secrets I confessed, the jokes we laughed and all the things I can remember about him is I want to forget.

Please give me the freedom. I hope you found yourself a lady that will love you without perfection, accepts your sweetness and bitterness, sacrifice her life just for you which I'm not.

I am sorry if I hurt you in some many way but honestly you hurt me a lot too ... almost a lot.

In memory of our LOVE...

GOODBYE MAMIS!

ARMM EMPLOYEES PERFORMING ARTS GUILD (AEPAG)

My Notes: From the ARMM Employees Performing Arts Guild Assessment and team building facilitated by Prof. Thallasah Alava.

In this modern age, research is significant in every endeavor of life may it conventional or modern. It is a great back-up for innovation and creativity. Thinking is a need. Luck and perfection is greater to those who think.

I think but so much I give way because I felt inferior and weak. I learned that through time we can achieve success through focus, imagination and the like. Gradual acquisition but not that mentally slow. Learned from the critics but don't stop the creativity. Don't be scared to share. Being negated is normal because your 10% idea composes the 100% of the general production.

Don't do only for entertainment, move for an advocacy; an information related to the event. We must be the catalyst for information. How to achieve? It is through openness and encouragement using research and logic. The management may use the authority in the beginning but when the organization raises time democracy can be achieve because members are already matured.

Creativity is magical not a magic. Why? I answered yes it is because creativity is created thru a supernatural injection of new information in an instant situation or by a snap or sec while magic is a trick that needs rigid training to achieve perfection of the idea. The characteristic of magical and magic is different because of its inspirational source.

#aepag

#sexyaja

#realization

HIPECBM: Mindanao Hiroshima Skill-up Training

BANGSAMORO GIRL TRAINED IN JAPAN 

   I am an alumna of Hiroshima Peace and Capacity Building for the Bangsamoro (HIPECBM) sponsored by Hiroshima University and Japan International Cooperation Agency (JICA). I am a Maguindanaon-Tausug in Cotabato CIty. I am working in the Department of Public Works and Highways as Audio-visual Production Officer. If you have the luxury of time to browse the net or facebook "DPWH on the Road", I am the voice behind it. Anyway, enough for the segway.  

I've been in Japan specifically to Higashi Hiroshima prefecture for one month on November 2015, January 2017 and July 2017, three times in a row for FREE. WOW! 

How did I do it?

I applied for it. Its not easy as 1-2-3 but the exposure I had in Japan was fun and exciting as ABC. Back to the question, how I did it? It was on year 2015 when I felt that it was the right time for me to join. I saw their posters in our graduate school in Mindanao State University Maguindanao and tarpaulin at St.Benedict College. I saw the first poster on 2014 but I was not confident enough back then seeing the procedure and requirement; there is a need for passport, transcript of records, filled up application forms and 2x2 photo. 

I didn't expect to chosen as part of 33 but I wish I wanted to be part of the 33. I think, they were convinced on my answers on the application questions. I was detailed, direct to the point, specific and passionate. My answers were related to my work experience, educational attainment and advocacy in life.  Hence, I am suggesting you to follow the same strategy. There is no lost in trying. 

Don't doubt yourself! Have faith and you can do it too! 

Kuba Community Center (Japan's Best Community Center) with my co-trainees (wearing gray clothes)

In our one month training, we learned the theories, concept and actual practice of Japanese people in governance and people management.

Walking in the Aisle with Blind Eyes

The night was dark and cold. I am walking alone in the streets, finding my way home. I  went out from office... and its time to  leave.

I am searching for things I wanted to know but I really don't know what I am searching for. Is this confusion that is playing on my mind?

I am young. I am a visionary. I have dreams. I have my passion but what happen to me? I am all stranded in this dark room... located in  this similar world. 

I have my light back then... but what happen? There is a sudden twist of events. 

A story of confusion... a statement of circumlocution... a fusion of all emotion. 

Now in this dark room, I am walking in the aisle... exploring the space with my two blind eyes.

---  out of the creativity  of  Manal JS.